Jimmy Kimmel returned to his day job Monday to give folks a fun postmortem of the Oscars — especially the part where John Cena hid his private parts while giving away the award for Best Costume.
After a quick fake-out by Justin Timberlake — who first took the stage of ABC’s late night show to say that he was filling in for the night– Kimmel emerged and immediately started listing his favorite moments from Sunday’s Academy Awards. (Timberlake is the night’s musical guest).
He was tickled by the way Arnold Schwarzenegger say the word Godzilla and he enjoyed the “I’m Just Ken” performance by Ryan Gosling, but the real highlight was when tribute was paid to the 50th Anniversary of the Oscars streaker back in 1974.
“Getting this on the air…of all the times I’ve hosted the Oscars or the Emmys or anything, no comedy bit has ever received more scrutiny than this,” Kimmel explained. “There were meetings and site meetings, emails and texts and phone calls and people sweating. Somebody was crying. Then once they realized we weren’t going to take no for an answer … there was intense discussion about the the envelope.”
Then Kimmel flashed the envelope that the brass wanted Cena to use, which was basically the size of a shoebox. Ultimately, Kimmel and his team went with the smaller envelope, which masked Cena’s unmentionables just fine.
“I’d say congratulations John Cena,” said Kimmel. “The commotion you caused. Very rarely does an idea literally push the envelope and this one did.”
Kimmel also showed viewers what they missed if they didn’t stick around for the credits at the end of the Oscar telecast; he had that little pisser Messi, the dog from Anatomy of a Fall, lift his leg over Matt Damon’s star on the Walk of Fame.
He also referenced the Donald Trump moment at the end of the show.
“It kind of tells you all you need to know about Donald Trump,” Kimmel said. “He wrote this because he was upset I didn’t mention him on the show. No one mentioned him on the show. He wasn’t getting any attention, he couldn’t stand it. And so then the Adderall McFlurry kicked in and he went right on. I wasn’t planning to mention him at all. We were backstage, the show was almost over and one of the other writers was like, ‘hey look at this.’ And to quote Al Pacino, just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in. I had to read it.”
“It’s funny,” Kimmel continued. “We had John Cena on stage naked and somehow Donald Trump still managed to be the biggest d–k of the night.”
Watch the opening monologue above.