Why Republican attacks on Kamala Harris’ family keep falling flat

That moment during last month’s Democratic National Convention when Gus Walz was openly overcome with joy and pride was beautiful. The lovely expression of emotion from the son of Democratic vice presidential nominee Tim Walz was made all the more poignant after we all learned about his neurodivergence. Many men have since discussed the importance of getting comfortable with their emotions. 

That was only one moment of breathtaking family values from the Democratic ticket. Republicans have worked to undermine that image of healthy and loving families ever since. 

At a recent Trump campaign rally, Arkansas Gov. Sarah Huckabee Sanders claimed that her children keep her humble, telling the audience that “unfortunately, Kamala Harris doesn’t have anything keeping her humble.” Harris’ stepchildren, in this equation, equal nothing. That’s of course contemptible, but it’s also a complete lie.

Harris’ stepchildren call her Momala. 

For those of you who did not grow up in Yiddish-infused households, let me briefly explain: the suffix -eleh is a diminutive term of affection. “Come here, Daniel” means “Come here.” “Come here, Danieleh” means “Oy get over here you delicious thing I have such a hug for you!” In the Harris-Emhoff family, the obvious rhyme asserted itself, so her family name is certainly clever. But don’t focus on the cleverness: focus on the affection.

When I see this affection, I remember the introduction into my own family of step-parents — so many step-parents! You don’t need me to tell you that blended families are hard. They can be brutal. Step-parents care for children who almost certainly meet them at first with suspicion if not resentment or even outright hostility. Figuring out who’s who, how this will work and what we call each other is a long negotiation that commonly never stops. Talk about keeping you humble! I have two step-parents whom I rarely call by that name. They entered too late — I think of them rather as my parents’ spouses, and it’s fine, and the love finds its own way, as does the family.

Kamala Harris’s step-children calling her by an affectionate name that plays on the word “Mom”? This evidences a household that has all the love it needs — and all the humility. It shows step-parents and stepchildren who have found their own way and clearly love each other. They show affection and laugh together, and compared to the family values we see among their opponents — the Trump family’s cold stares and awkward, A-frame stage hugs come quickly to mind, as does Vance’s scorn for families that do not contain children — they look like the rest of us: joking, touching, communicating through glance and smile. We’re sure they have the same bickers and feuds we all have, too, and that’s comforting. They act like us. They are a stepfamily, but they are a happy family. So many of us know: that’s not easy. That’s not always the case. Any blended family that has found a way — through the awkwardness and frustration and unfamiliarity — to affection, even to love? 

They worked for that. They earned that. They built that.

Harris has an enormous resume, with skills as an attorney, an orator and a policymaker. But what makes her stand out to me is Momala: words of love from her stepchildren. That shows that the people who know her best love her. You can’t fake that.

When the “Addams Family” movies came out decades ago, the main joke was that this strange-looking family was actually the most functional family we could find: the parents loved each other, the family members were unfailingly kind to one another, they stood together when the harsh outside world unthinkingly mocked them. 

At the top of the Democratic ticket, we see two families that love each other, that are kind to one another, that stand together when the harsh outside world unthinkingly mocks them.

Just as the chants of “USA!” seem to indicate the Democrats are reclaiming their share of patriotism, these families at the top of the ballot show that Democrats are reclaiming their status as defenders of family values.