Sandy Hook, Connecticut — Jon Romano, 36, is a convicted school shooter. Back in 2004, then 16-year-old Romano walked into his high school, Columbia High School in East Greenbush, with a shotgun. He injured one teacher and traumatized hundreds of fellow students. He was charged with three counts of attempted murder in the second degree, one count of assault in the second degree, and 82 counts of reckless endangerment in the first degree to which he accepted a plea agreement and was sentenced to 20 years in prison, to be followed by a five-year period of post-release supervision. After serving 16 years, he was released in 2020. After his release, Romano took to TikTok to share his story, record his return to society, and use the platform to discuss gun safety, and prison reform and raise mental health awareness.
“I wanted to give a better understanding of what prison is actually like, how people who end up in prison are actually like because we had this Hollywood version of what life was like being behind bars,” he said.
His videos quickly went viral, garnering hundreds of thousands of views on the popular app. Romano has attained over 290,000 followers since he first posted in 2022, with over 7.7 million likes.
Many have questioned his intent and the impact of his openly talking about the crime he committed. Dr. Anne Balboni, a psychologist who specializes in first responders’ trauma of mass shootings, said she had doubts about Romano’s intent to spread his message on TikTok.
“I find that very scary, to be perfectly honest with you. I think he lacks a complete understanding of what he’s done,” said Dr. Balboni, “It seems to me it’s about him. That seems pretty selfish- it’s about him. It’s not about anyone else. So, when we look at that almost lack of empathy for what he actually did, and that needs to draw attention to himself right now, to put himself in a position of authority, when he’s a criminal, he’s a shooter, he destroyed lives.”
Despite doubt and outcries, Romano said he wanted to provide answers to youth violence as someone who had walked that path. According to an FBI report, youth violence is one of the greatest crime problems faced in the United States. There have been 413 school shootings since the Columbine school shooting in 1999, according to data from the Washington Post. A 2020 Secret Service report points out the average grade levels of school attackers ranged from 7th to 12th.
After his release, Romano said he began working at the IPH Community Connections shelter as a volunteer, where he was injured in a sword attack by one of the shelter’s patrons in 2022. He said he has since permanently lost the use of his hands. Romano said his hands being semi-paralyzed had added to the urgency for him to use his voice to speak up for issues he cared about, and TikTok was one of the most effective tools.
“I understand how difficult and painful my account can be, but we have seen survivors talking for years after the Parkland, Florida, ‘March for Our Lives. There was so much hope, and they got ignored and harassed. I can speak up, and they can hate me,” he said.
But one person is willing to believe him. She is Scarlett Lewis, the mother of 6-year-old Jesse who was one of the 20 children gunned down in the Sandy Hook Shooting in 2012. Her sons death had led her onto a journey of seeking prevention of future school shootings, and she founded the Jesse Lewis Choose Love Movement to offer free character social emotional development programs about how to address youth trauma that might lead them to violence. She said her program is now in over 10,000 schools.
“After my son was murdered, I never got a chance to talk to Adam Lanza, he killed himself at the scene. And, you know, I dedicated my life to being part of the solution to these issues, I knew that what happened at Sandy Hook was 100% preventable. And so, I set out to do just that. And I’ve spent the last 11 years of my life, really researching and addressing the root cause of what led to my son’s murder, but also leads to so many other diseases of despair that continue to escalate in our society,” said Lewis.
After discovering Romano on TikTok, Lewis said she wanted to see for herself if he truly was “trying to be a part of the solution.” They quickly formed a friendship after connecting through a phone interview and decided to partner on promoting the message of forgiveness and mental health with hopes to prevent further school shootings and bring light to social emotional development. Lewis recruited Romano as an ambassador for her foundation and together they plan on touring the country to speak in schools and communities.
“I’ve spent a considerable amount of time with Jon, speaking with him. And I do believe that he’s being sincere,” Lewis said, “I believe Jon can be a good influence on those listening to him on TikTok because of the many dark forums they can be lead astray with as opposed to Jons message encouraging those in crisis to take another route.”
Romano said it has been inspiring to collaborate with Lewis to spread their message of nurturing, healing, and love.
“She’s been showing us that you actually can walk the walk that so many people talk about,” he said.