People say there are plenty of fish in the sea—but one woman on TikTok is questioning just how many.
A video posted to TikTok by Sam Petrellese (@angelsam444) has gone viral for her passionate questions about how people manage to be in consecutive relationships. Petrellese, 23, told Newsweek about what inspired her to make the clip and her own experiences with finding love. Since the video was posted, it has received over 758,000 views and over 142,000 likes.
“I will never understand how people are chronically in relationships,” she said in the video. “I just don’t understand how you can find multiple people that you want to date… [I] have not found one singular man in 23 years that I want to be with.”
@angelsam444/TikTok
She continued: “How girls are finding men back-to-back blows my mind… I had a friend that was in a relationship for five years, and they broke up… she’s like, ‘I actually met someone new.'”
Petrellese said that she was inspired to make the video after realizing she knew a lot of people who jump from relationship to relationship.
“It’s something that I never really understood,” she said. “Whenever my friends tell me they found someone new after just getting out of a relationship, I’m confused where they are finding these people and it makes me question if I’m the problem—if I have too high standards, or am too picky.”
On reflection, though, Petrellese said it is more about her outlook on dating than it is about taste.
“I don’t think I’ve been in a relationship yet because I’ve never wanted to date just to date. I’m content with being alone and would never settle,” she said. “I’m looking for someone I have a strong connection with and someone that makes my life better. I have seen a lot of girls settle in relationships with guys that don’t treat them like they deserve to be treated.”
What Did the Comments Say?
People in the comments had strong opinions about what keeps people in consecutive relationships. Many, like Petrellese, couldn’t understand the impulse, while others said it might have to do with a fear of being alone.
“The older I get, the more I understand some people just can’t be alone,” one person wrote.
“Once I have a crush, I need at least a year to recuperate if it doesn’t work out, maybe longer,” another person commented.
“The response on this video consisted mostly of comments saying that relationship hoppers probably don’t know how to be alone, and those people themselves even admitted they crave validation from other people and yearn to be loved,” Petrellese said. “I think it’s so important to learn how to be content with being alone… Once you learn how to be alone and love yourself, better people will come into your life, and you’ll end up with someone great.”
Petrellese’s resolve means people have to step it up if they want her attention—but they are not competing against each other.
“I always say that guys are competing with myself,” she said. “Someone needs to treat me better than I can treat myself.”